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  • Writer's pictureSharon Van Baale

Choose the Joy of Children

It has been on my mind lately, that I have been guilty of thinking that Roe vs Wade did women a favor by giving them the right to control their own bodies. I have heard this since the Supreme Court came down with the decision. It was controlled through the media back then, just like now, to make it a good thing that women finally had control over their own bodies. Abortion never really entered my mind. I was one of those Pro-Choice people, even though I was really too young to know what I was being force-fed to believe. I hadn't really gotten into politics, yet or the games that go with it. I have since, come to this conclusion:

Women have the right to control their bodies. God gave that to them. What they absolutely do not have, is the right to take the life of their own child. That child is alive and has God-given rights.

I was thrilled to be given more freedom to be me and do what I wanted. I had just come out from under the control of my parents and right into being controlled by my husband. Prior to the 1970's, a husband could pretty much do whatever he wanted to or with his wife legally in all 50 states and some until early 90's, so that when the media made it sound so empowering that I could control my own body, it was exhilarating. What I didn't consider, is that the right to abort my baby was not good at all. It was the freedom that I was acquiring, not the ability to kill my child.

Fortunately, it never crossed my mind that I could ever do that anyway. I may not be the most Godly person you'll ever know, but I could not kill my, nor anyone else's child, in the womb or out... moments old or 10 years. I believe that once the child is a life inside the womb and that is very early after consummation, then your chance to not be pregnant is over. Birth control has been available since creation beginning with abstinence, if nothing else.

It just occurred to me that I have known several people that have stated to me in no uncertain terms, that they never wanted children, which is their prerogative (as long as they are preventing pregnancy before conception.) However, those same people, when finding themselves or their wives pregnant, always chose life and seem to be some of the world's greatest parents.

I have never considered abortion at any time. I had my two children and have never looked back. It was hard at times, but worth it. Raising children is hard to do correctly, but I think God intended parents and children to figure it out together. It helps the bonds form. I know there is nothing in this world that could replace any connection I had with my children, good or bad. They are both good men and fathers, so I feel like I can at least take the credit for part of that. I learned much from them, too.

One time when I was going through a divorce with their father, God slammed me on a chair as He told me to sit down and listen. I had just yelled at one of my kids for nothing and He explained to me in no uncertain terms that my yelling was to stop. It was hurting my children and none of anything going on was their fault. I stopped right then and there and we were all happier for it. I wish it had happened sooner. I didn't know much about hearing from God at that time, but there was no doubting what happened.

I began to pay more attention to the little things my children did. They were so sweet and kind, bringing me flowers and kisses. I learned to raise them to be boys, by gingerly picking up grasshoppers and frogs and helping them not be afraid of them. We read books and books, colored together, went to the park, tossed the ball around some, went fishing, played games and other things that made us closer.

Anyway, I do not understand how someone could not love a child, given a chance. They are as sweet and courteous as you teach or allow them to be.

So when one chooses to abort their child, they are only looking at the bad and not the good that can come with parenthood. Sure it is expensive to raise a child and it takes away your free time, and it is harder if there isn't a father helping.

But raising that child brings so much joy that overrides everything else. It also, built my self-esteem and gave me courage so that I could do anything. It taught me all about what love is and how much my heart hurts when something is wrong with them or our relationship.

And then, there are the grandkids and great-grandkids!

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